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2019 -Goodbye you Bastard


Already 2020 is way better. An optometrist in Pittsburgh diagnosed me, over the Thanksgiving holiday, with either a rare malady (hardly seen in the developed world and caused by an untreated social disease) or a brain tumor. I'm serious. For five days, I knew I was dying and developed all sorts of strange symptoms. I suddenly couldn't remember things like where I left my phone. I had a constant eye twitch. I was already planning in my head what songs I wanted my all-star band to play at the funeral. Everyone would be really really sad, I'd get a nice obit in the Times (without one mention of Katy Perry's "I Kissed a Girl") and we'd end the night celebrating and dancing to "September" by Earth Wind & Fire. Steve Earle would sing the lead vocals. Imagine that in your head.

After being a total wreck, as well as confused and ashamed that I somehow contracted a rare deadly social disease, I finally got in to see my regular doctor back home. His diagnosis was... the optometrist was crackpot. He said I would most likely have to wait a few more years to hire my crack funeral band. As soon as I left his office, my eye twitch went away. I still can't remember where I leave my phone, but also remembered I've been like that for years.

So...I'm not going anywhere. And, for those living in or near NYC, I'll be at Joe's Pub on the 28th.

I'm mostly working on my musical ""F*ck 7th Grade" but am doing a bunch of house concerts. I'm also booking for the Summer. So, hit me up if you are thinking of hosting one. I love doing them and will impress all your friends and neighbors by having me!

And yes, plan on a trip to Pittsburgh in May (May 9-31) to see me play and "act". You can tell all your friends that you saw it way before it went on to be a big hit on Broadway.

I'll end this with a video, I just found, of a live version of "Good Life". For some reason, I brought the audience up onstage to sing.

Tomorrow a tiny cell might grow In everyone, and it's not the cold Or the hole in the sky will open wide The aliens land on the 105

If it comes to that What can we do? You loved me and I loved you It was a good life It was a good, good life


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